It’s my B
Day
So it’s my Birthday today
and I am now age 39 years old!
Three years ago this scared
me, the getting old thing, really scared me! Still does. Getting closer to 40
kind of meant I was half way to 80 and that just freak’s
me out. Only 26 more years and we retire, then what!
I am curious though, about
getting old and where that will take me and our family!
For the past few years, the
couple of days leading up to the B Day was always full of worry, anxiety and a
lot of fear thrown into the mix as well. It happened this time too and I get
way to emotional.
I guess were I come undone
is; I think about my girls and what will become of them when I am older and no
longer able to care for them, particularly Madison. At this stage we see it
like this, that she will live with us as an adult and grow old with us. I know there are
other options out there but she is way too little yet for me to think about
that and it just breaks my heart to think of it too. Of course then what
becomes of her when we are gone. Scary!
Jaimee, we know will be
fabulous at what ever she decides to do with her life, career, travel,
marriage, kids (hopefully a couple, no pressure there) and she will be
independent, confidant and capable of achieving those life milestones. I know Jaimee
would always make sure her sister was looked after properly and kept safe, as
any sibling would. She does ask frequently if she has to take care of Madison when they are
older and that’s a whole other story right there but of course the answer is
no.
Is it silly to think those
things and feel that fear? I imagine everyone does at one time or another.
I do know in my heart that
we just have to live each day as it comes especially with Madison. We have no clue as to what she will
be like in a year let alone 10 years. For someone like me who needs to be
organised this is difficult. I have the year planned out, have goals set, nothing in stone but
at least have some direction as to how we would like to see our life flow.
Living each day as it comes, is a bit tricky.
Ad said to me yesterday,
“You should be so happy to of made it to 39, not many people do!’’ He is right
of course and I am ever so grateful for the life I have and feel very fortunate
to have the family and friends that are in our little circle. He also said “No
matter what, we will always have each other, love each other and our girls and
we will survive like we have always done”, who knew he was so clever!
I woke up this morning with
a smile on my face cause it was my Birthday!!
Today it is a beautiful
day, the sun is out and it is glorious!
Adam woke up and gave me a
happy birthday kiss. Then went surfing! J
Jaimee helped Madison to come and say a “happy
birthday mummy”, to me with kisses and cuddles.
Sent the girls off to
school, they did try their hardest to stay home.
Indy our Labrador
and I went for a run. Best feeling ever when the sun is out, it’s only 7.30 am
and there is a chill in the air as it is getting further into autumn.
 |
| Indy and I met this fellow down at the duck pond on our run. |
Adam and I went and had a
yummy breakfast at a place called My Place. It is down on the esplanade in
Coolum across from the beach, perfect!
Naughty French toast with
Berries and maple syrup, earl grey tea and a freshly squeezed pineapple juice.
Awesome!
 |
| View from My Place on the esplanade Coolum. |
Bek, Clay and Miss Scarlett
met us for a quick coffee and a birthday prize, love prizes! Love to see Miss Scarlett
too; she always makes me so happy and smiley.
 |
| Miss Scarlett and me |
Then home again, Ad goes to
golf and I get some quiet me time, ahhhh love it!
I got to read my new book,
did a little crocheting and put on Mr & Mrs Murder, my new favourite show!
Big birthday prize, then I
turned back into mum again.
 |
| Love my new prize! |
Great Birthday for me!!
Ohhh and Ad had a great B
Day for me too, surfin, golf, the footy is on and he has some wild turkey that
seems to be disappearing fast!! Bwahhaa, it’s nice to share a good day.
So I guess the next time my
birthday comes around, it’s a big one, 40, Yikes!!!!
I’ve got a whole year till
that happens and anyway, I hear thirty is the new forty or is it forty is the new
thirty, ha, is that what people say to keep old people happy J
Till next time
Steph
x
